I feel like I'm in a weird stage of life right now. Somehow, my kids just kept getting older and I'm no longer a mom to only babies and toddlers, a mom planning play dates and park days and cherishing their nap time. And I don't know what to do with myself.
I don't know what my mom did with her days when I was the age of my kids because I was off at school. My kids are homeschooled, so of course, a huge chunk of my day is spent schooling them. A huge chunk should also be spent planning out their education, but that isn't always the case. I told them the other day after hearing them moan for the bazillionth time when I said it was time to start school that there were other things I could be doing with my day that were more enjoyable then having them throw a fit at me because they were given a math worksheet to do.
My biggest problem is how to be social. And, I'll admit, that's always been one of my problems. BUT, I felt like I had mom things pretty well down before my kids were school-aged. We had play dates. We went over to friends houses or had their friends over to our house. I could go visiting teaching and it was normal to have all of my kids with me. I could go grocery shopping with all of my kids at 11AM on a weekday and not get weird looks.
Now I try to drag my kids to a park day, but realize quickly from the need to drag them that they are too old to socialize with the three and under crowd at a park day.
While I've met some homeschooling moms that I've gotten along great with, this is not always the case. It's not that I don't get along with them. We just don't click. And it isn't like hanging out with other moms whose kids are in school. If your kids are in school, they're in school. If you homeschool, there are hundreds of different ways, methods, curricula, styles, to chose from and your style doesn't always mesh with the other moms style, and maybe it's just me, but I don't think of myself as the typical homeschooling mom. I have nothing against public schools. Truly. Well, I guess there are a few things, but those are all just concerns about what my babies are exposed to hanging out with other kids from different backgrounds. Not necessarily the public school-ness of it. I don't homeschool because of my religious beliefs. To me, it's just a way to be more involved in my children's education, knowing what they are learning and being a part of it.
So I'm wandering around like an 11 girl trying to figure out if she should play with a doll or like a boy. I thought adulthood was supposed to be easy compared to growing up!