"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of. but do it in private
and wash your hands afterwards." --Robert Heinlein.

We've moved!

For the next two years (Summer 2014-Summer 2016) I'll be blogging our family's adventures in China at www.chinesemileposts.wordpress.com

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Observing

I'm an observer. I think I get it from my mom who likes to people watch. I may not strike up conversations with all the other parents picking up their kids from school, but I'm listening to them and hearing their stories.

There's this one mom who I saw start a conversation with another mom a couple weeks ago. I got the idea that their kids had gone to preschool together a year ago or something. I don't know exactly, I just got the impression that they are more acquaintance/friend than friend/friend. If that makes sense.

So every couple of days I end up standing near them as we're all waiting for our kids to be released and I hear tidbits of conversation here and there. Basically what I've learned is that the one woman is going through a bitter divorce and her husband has a new girlfriend. I feel for her, I do. But I also feel for this acquaintance/friend who is forced to listen to all this complaining each time they meet. The husband's girlfriend's shoes were in the car when he picked up the kids, rubbing it in her face. The girlfriend spending the night at his house when he has the kids. Etc. Etc. This woman just seems like the embodiment of all bitter divorcee stereotypes. It's like a brand new mom who can only talk about her baby. My baby this, my baby that. Obviously I hope never to get divorced, but I also hope that nothing so depressing and negative takes over my entire being. Being able to only think or talk about a newborn is one thing. Being totally focused on only your nasty divorce and your unhappiness is another. And I'm sure that if it were me I would definitely want to complain and swear and throw some things as well. And it isn't wrong to let something huge like divorce consume you, your marriage is important, it falling apart would be devastating. It just seems like focusing on so much negative can't do anything but add more negativeness.

I guess part of my thinking here is because Eat, Pray, Love deals a lot with Elizabeth Gilbert's recovery from divorce. She was the one who ended her marriage, but she's dealing with her husband's harshness, unforgiveness and negativity while also trying to move on with her life and deal with her own disappointment in herself, him, life, etc.

Just some random thoughts. Even I'm not sure where they came from.

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