I overheard my husband on the phone the other day with his little brother offering dating advice. Then I heard my husband say, "There’s nothing wrong with girlie girls. I like girlie girls. I married one." And he smiled my way. My first reaction was; Am I really a girlie girl? Then; I guess that’s not bad. Then it hit me. I’ve spent my whole life trying NOT to be a girlie girl. I wouldn’t even wear pink until I had a daughter old enough to help her daddy pick out presents for me.
Growing up, I sort of liked to think of myself as a feminist. Something that my husband has made fun of me for since I told it to him in conversation early on in our marriage. But the more I think of it, the more it isn’t really feminism that I’m claiming. Yeah, I want women to have a chance at education and big jobs and big pay and respect. But mostly, I just didn’t want to be categorized as a girlie girl. I’m not high maintenance (my husband may argue that). I’m not overly emotional. I would prefer not to talk about what I’m feeling. There are girls out there who are way more girlie than I am. WAY! (Can I dot that exclamation point with a heart?)
I was never the type of girls who was flirty and acted dumb around boys. They are embarrassing to womankind. I was shy around boys, but that’s just part of who I am. I enjoyed sports. Watching them, but not necessarily playing them. Which as I reflect back, could be part of why my husband categorizes me as a girlie girl. I don’t obsess over clothes or make-up. I do like shoes. But that doesn’t make me too girlie, does it?
I guess I just always liked the idea of being one of the boys. I wanted to hang out with the guys and do guy things. I wasn’t even really a tom boy. I’ve always been pretty wimpy and hesitant to try new things. But when given the choice as a kid whether I wanted to clean the house as my chore, or do yard work. I chose yard work. I’d much rather watch baseball or football on TV with my dad than go shopping with my mom or my sister.
I guess as I’ve grown up I’ve become more comfortable with being feminine. Feminine is good. Girlie, not so much. It just seems like a term to describe one of those high maintenance, condo girl of America (as a friend dubbed them in college) type girls.
Apparently, I was a girlie girl in denial trying to pull off that she was a tom boy. But if girlie means feminine, I guess I can accept that.
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