"Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of. but do it in private
and wash your hands afterwards." --Robert Heinlein.

We've moved!

For the next two years (Summer 2014-Summer 2016) I'll be blogging our family's adventures in China at www.chinesemileposts.wordpress.com

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Girlie Girl

I overheard my husband on the phone the other day with his little brother offering dating advice. Then I heard my husband say, "There’s nothing wrong with girlie girls. I like girlie girls. I married one." And he smiled my way. My first reaction was; Am I really a girlie girl? Then; I guess that’s not bad. Then it hit me. I’ve spent my whole life trying NOT to be a girlie girl. I wouldn’t even wear pink until I had a daughter old enough to help her daddy pick out presents for me.

Growing up, I sort of liked to think of myself as a feminist. Something that my husband has made fun of me for since I told it to him in conversation early on in our marriage. But the more I think of it, the more it isn’t really feminism that I’m claiming. Yeah, I want women to have a chance at education and big jobs and big pay and respect. But mostly, I just didn’t want to be categorized as a girlie girl. I’m not high maintenance (my husband may argue that). I’m not overly emotional. I would prefer not to talk about what I’m feeling. There are girls out there who are way more girlie than I am. WAY! (Can I dot that exclamation point with a heart?)

I was never the type of girls who was flirty and acted dumb around boys. They are embarrassing to womankind. I was shy around boys, but that’s just part of who I am. I enjoyed sports. Watching them, but not necessarily playing them. Which as I reflect back, could be part of why my husband categorizes me as a girlie girl. I don’t obsess over clothes or make-up. I do like shoes. But that doesn’t make me too girlie, does it?

I guess I just always liked the idea of being one of the boys. I wanted to hang out with the guys and do guy things. I wasn’t even really a tom boy. I’ve always been pretty wimpy and hesitant to try new things. But when given the choice as a kid whether I wanted to clean the house as my chore, or do yard work. I chose yard work. I’d much rather watch baseball or football on TV with my dad than go shopping with my mom or my sister.

I guess as I’ve grown up I’ve become more comfortable with being feminine. Feminine is good. Girlie, not so much. It just seems like a term to describe one of those high maintenance, condo girl of America (as a friend dubbed them in college) type girls.

Apparently, I was a girlie girl in denial trying to pull off that she was a tom boy. But if girlie means feminine, I guess I can accept that.

2 comments:

wendys said...

If it makes you feel better... I never thought of you as a girlie girl! But then again I never think of myself as a girlie girl because I love camping and hiking but I also hate sports and love shoes. Maybe I am in denial as well!

A Random Stranger said...

I'm better off not reading your blog, aren't I? I think this is what I meant when I said that: you have breasts and don't hide them under a flannel shirt. Voila! Girlie Girl. I think we have different ideas of what makes a girlie girl. The things you describe (vapidness, materialism) are not things I would want in a wife. Which is good, because you don't have them. I don't know. Nevermind. Forget I said it. You're not a girlie girl; you're basically a dude. A dude who can squeeze out babies from his nether regions.

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