I had four problems with school:
- I'm crap at math.
- I was super smart, all As up until high school, and it went downhill from there.
- Due to the failed smartness, I started not trying hard, not studying, as an excuse for when I would inevitably fail.
- I'm a huge procrastinator. Especially when it comes to book reading and paper writing.
How is this affecting my life today? I read voraciously, but when it comes to an assigned book, like for a book club... I can't get into it. Even if it's a good book. I have to force myself to really read it. Right now, I'm in two book clubs... both sort of started by me. I thought this would be great, I'm always looking for suggestions for books to read. My problem? Right now one book club has selected The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck and the other has picked Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe. Both schooly type books. Both difficult reads. Things Fall Apart has actually been on my reading list for years. I even own it. I've just never gotten around to reading it... it would be too much work. The Good Earth, if any of you have anything good to say about this book, please tell me now. I read the publishers note on Amazon.com about it, and thought... I have no desire to read this book. But I have to. I started the book club. I made all these people read Candyfreak and half of them hated it.
So, not only are these two hard, schooly type books. They are both "assigned" at the same time. And all the while, I have 800+paged Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell up on my nightstand, 40 pages into it, that I have renewed as many times as I could from the library, returned it, and rechecked it out, and renewed it again. And it's good. I'm just so stinkin' intimidated by its length, and so distracted by all the other equally good books out there. It's like school again and I'm afraid I'm just going to give up on getting all this reading done. Like all the times I'm asked if I've read Frankenstein or Wuthering Heights and I have to admit that I've studied both of them twice each in college, yet I've failed to read either. (Although I believe I own the Cliff's Notes for both.) That's bad news for someone with a BS in English.